


Sun Wukong? More like Dad that lost his new son at a Festival

by Shan_The_Potato_Chip_Simp



Series: The Crack Playlist [1]
Category: LEGO Monkie Kid
Genre: Dad Wukong being a Dad, How Do I Tag, Mk just being baby, any and all gods in the court of heaven, honestly just mentions of mei and everyone elsce, lego monkei kid, please please check the notes, this is just pure crack in my opinion, this is my first time go easy on me pleas UwU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:13:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27883561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shan_The_Potato_Chip_Simp/pseuds/Shan_The_Potato_Chip_Simp
Summary: “Have you seen my son!? He’s about this tall and obviously gay, but we haven’t had the talk yet”(this was an ask prompt from dorykitcat to winterpower98 on tumblr)
Series: The Crack Playlist [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2186484
Comments: 16
Kudos: 100





	1. "Your going to attend the Peach Festival w/ me"

**Author's Note:**

> Basically this was an ask WinterPower98 got a while back, about Sun dragging MK to Heaven to show em off. And Mk being Mk gets distracted, wanders off, and Sun Wukong goes ape shit.  
> here's the thread link to that,  
> https://rip-a-dip-dip-you-potato-chip.tumblr.com/post/636348958758862848/ok-i-have-this-sinariyo-in-my-head-that-i-just
> 
> In short this is a crack fic

“You want me to, what?”

To say Mk was confused was an understatement. The day had started like any other day. He woke up in his flat above the noodle shop. Got dressed in a rush like always, got half-heartedly yelled at by Piggsy as Mr. Tang watched with amusement. As he made his deliveries, he practiced his focus. Making the occasional stop to pick up a drink, or play a quick video game. When the time came for him to call it quits at work he pole vaulted all the way to Flower Fruit Mountain for his training later that evening. As Mk hit the sandy the sent of the island enveloped him, it's sent familiar and inviting. Taking the usual path, with the company of the other monkeys that lived on the island he made his way to the home of the Monkey King. And it was here where the Great Sage, Equal to Heaven itself, had asked him to attend the Queen Mother of Heaven’s annual peach festival, in Heaven.

“You heard me, I want you to come with me to the annual peach festival in heaven!” Monkey King repeated a smile ever-present.

“But why? Besides the last peach festival you attended, you ended up fighting like twenty-seven lightning spirits!” “First off, it was thirty six thunder deity's, and they attacked me first! And second, I've been meaning to show _www_ -” Mk cocked an eyebrow “I mean, introduce you to all of my old pal’s in Heaven! Yup totally!”

The young adult gave his mentor a questioning look, but untimely came to be more accepting. “If you say so,” The Monkie Kid said. An uneasy expression made its way across his face.

“What's with the long face bud? I thought with how much of a nerd you are, you'd be more excited about this”

“I AM! It's just after the thing with Macaque…”

Ahh, right, Mk was still beating himself up about Macaque tricking him into going against Wukong. Taking in his ~~_son’s_~~ apprentices' distress he pulled him into a tight one-armed hug.

“You'll be fine!” The monkey said with a smile of reassurance. “Trust me when I say, you got nothing to worry about ya?” Looking up at his mentor then back down to the staff in his hands, Mk let loose one of his smiles that seemed to clear away the darkness as he looked back up to Wukong. And Wukong smiled back.

_This was going to be an interesting festival._


	2. "WHO THE FUCK PUTS SOY IN THEIR COFFEE?!"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Kid!?! that fathers adrenaline is kicking in! QI XIAOTIAN!!!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This will contain an ungodly amount of crack, mainly form Wukong freaking the fuck out.

Days went by fast. 

Battles with the Demon Bull fam, and work just seem to go by in a blurr. The thought of attending the Peach festival raced in Mk’s mind as the date approached faster with each day. He and Mei had actually gone out to buy better suited clothes for Mk to attend the festival in. In the end, as the two were trying to pick out something the Monkey King himself(in the form of a dog, as not to draw suspicion) crashed in on them to add his opinion on things. 

They spent a good couple hours trying to find something. And just when Mk thinks he’s found the right thing to wear, not only is it out of his price range, but the wrong size as well. So just as the two kids walked out the clothing store in defeat, Wukong(having perched himself in Mk’s head in dog form) let it slip that he had already picked out the exact same thing, days ago, even before Mk had agreed to go to the festival. 

Que Mei and Mk trying to yeet a shiba with a monkey tail, only for it to turn into a ladybug and just dip. 

“Monkey King can be such a troll!”

Mk swears he heard a laugh not far off in the distance.

* * *

Today was the day. Today Mk would be going to the court to heaven for the first time ever, and to attend the Peach festival no less! Mk had on, the Tang Suit Monkey king had apparently bought him after there little shopping adventure. It was nothing too fancy, it was plain red with some yellowish gold pattern that looked like a monkey, on brand he mused. 

The Great Sage Equal to Heaven Itself, Sun Wukong, didn't even bother to look for part and was in his usual clothing. The basic bitch. Not that anyone would say that to his face. Maybe Macaque, and DBK would, ya, they definitely would. The fools. But disguising who Sun Wukong would and wouldn't beat to a poodle of unrecognizable mush means nothing right now! You heard me, NOTHING! 

“Okay, bud, before we go, I have one important rule when we're in heaven.” Wukong said turning to face his _son_ , _**apprentice**_ , no not _son_ , the kid _isn't yours_ \- 

“Don’t piss anyone off?” Mk questioned, fiddling with the cuff of his suit. Wukong gave a thoughtful look for a split second before snorting a laugh. 

“Okay, maybe two rules, but the most important one, is stay close to me” “I would think not pissing off a god and getting trapped under a mountain for five hundred plus years would be more important.” “So would I!” Wukong tossed his arms above his head dramatically, before bringing them back to his hip. “But heaven is a big place and you could find yourself lost. And probably end up pissing off a god that would trap you under a mountain for five hundred plus years.” Wukong stated with the wave of his hand. 

“Stay close, and don't get trapped under a mountain. Got it.” Mk reiterated in short. Seemed lagit enough for the Monkie Kid. Monkey King laughed a little.

And with that agreement the two were off, Wukong transporting the two of them on a  Somersault Cloud. He made a mental note to teach his kid- _no Sun, NO_! Mk isn't your kid- _at least not legally_ \- god’s what is this kid going to him?As the two neared Heaven Wukong gained a heavy unease. He didn't even realize he was dwelling on that fact, that Mk was asking him something. 

“Monkey King!” “What?” slightly turning to face his disciple. 

“Something wrong? You look kinda stressed.” 

Sun bit his lip. 

“Remember the two rules?” “Stay close to you, and don’t piss off a god so I don’t get stuck under a mountain for five hundred plus years? Ya why?” “welllll _llllllll_ , i'm thinking we need a third one.” 

Mk gave a questioning look. “A third one?” 

“Y-ya, since you're such a nerd I figured, you know that the Jade Emperor, and those other sticklers in the bureaucracy tend to get when they see someone that's more powerful than them...” Realization hit’s Mk like a strike from the staff. 

“You want me to give you the staff-” “I want you to give me the staff, till further notice. Or at least till we get back to Flower Fruit Mountain” 

Mk grabbed the staff form where he had stashed it, and looked at it for a second, then back to his _fath_ \- mentor, **_MENTOR_** , get your head in the game. This is serious Qi Xiaotian. Monkey King had gone back to looking forward to where they were going. 

“Sure, I understand,” He said, handing the staff forward to Wukong. The monkey gingerly took the stick from his successor, shooting him a shake, but a thankful smile. 

* * *

After about half an hour of silence, Mk had gotten too distracted by the clouds to chatter, they arrived at heaven. Upon checking his apprentice, Mk looked like a kid in a candy store. He looked so excited that he might just explode. 

“How you holdin’ up kid?” “Words, not, describe” Wukong laughed at the response, slapping him on the back, but it didn't seem to faze the kid. 

Wukong wrapped his tail around Mk’s wrist and pulled him along. As they walked they passed some minor gods, random spirits, and attendance buzzing around, non paying much attention to them as they walked by. Mk being the fanboy he is, would ask about something that looks relatively cool or important and the Monkey would answer. And occasionally Wukong would bring mention to a specific part of heaven they were in.

“And over there is where I was kept in Lao Tzu’s magic brazzer for forty nine days!” The Monkey King pointed out with glee. 

“What was it like being stuck in that thing for so long?” Mk asked curiously. He knew from JTTW that Wukong was shoved in that thing to remove the elixir that made him like all kinds of immortal, but instead just gave him red eyes for some reason. Speaking of why were his eyes a golden color? Were the red eyes like a temporary thing or did he like, get that stuff fixed? Also, doesn't Monkey King have lawyers? Why would he, The Great Sage Equal to Heaven need law-

“Eh, it was dry for the most part.” Wukong responds with a wave. 

* * *

The two continued walking, Wukong gladly answering Mk’s seemingly infinet questions about the place and some of the other god’s as well. Speaking of gods.

“Is that a monkey in clothes I see?” A familiar spear wielding deity made itself known. In his excitement Wukong’s tail lost its grip from Mk’s wrist. 

**_NOT GOOD_**! GO BACK GRAB HIS WIST DAMN IT- and you're to far away oh fucking hell... 

“Nezha!” The stone monkey cheered. Prince Nezha floated over to the monkey and was soon enveloped in a hug. 

“Good to see you again! How've you been?” Wukong said letting go of Nezha. Nezha twirled his spear a little, a smile plastered on his face.

“Ha, you know it's been good, fought a couple demons here and there.” The raven haired deity responded. But perked up a little after a second.

“What about you? Rumor has it you got a successor. Which by the way, the Jade Emperor just about looked like he was going to break down crying at the mere mention of” Oh shit that's right! He originally came to show off his son, _no_ \- apprentice, _not_ son, how many times must you make this mistake Wukong! 

Masking the internal parental urges, Wukong dubbed over in laughter. Calming down he spoke.

“Oh ya I got myself a successor, you're going to love him Nezha” “Cool! So when can I stop by to meet the kid?” confusion made itself known on the Monkey King’s face. 

“What you mean he’s right here” gesturing to his side. It was Nezha’s turn to be confused. 

“Right where?” “Right hereeee _eeee- **AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA**_ '' as Wukong turned to face his apprentice, and Mk was nowhere in sight, so he proceeded to scream. 

Looks like the ‘stay close’ rule went right out the window. 

“Uh, you okay Wukong?” “ **NO! NO I AM NOT OKAY!** ” 

“Is something the matter?- Oh hey Wukong! what's up?” Another deity welcomed himself into the conversation, having heard a scream come from his direction. Out of everything this deity was not expecting to see a confused Prince Nezha, and a panicking Sun Wukong. 

“Hey Erlang” Nezha welcomed the elder deity, ya, this was Erlang Shen, the very same Erlang that got into a shapeshifter duel with the Monkey King before Lao Tzu showed up and apprehended him with a diamond snar. Just before Erlang could question what was up with Wukong he was, pulled face to face with the Monkey, arms now facing a tight grip due to Sun grabbing him. 

“HAVE YOU SEEN MY SON!?” “son-wha” “HE’S ABOUT THIS TALL” letting go of Erlang, and pointed towards Nezha, implying his son, Mk, and Nezha were the same height. “ _CLEARLY GAY_ BUT WE HAVEN’T HAD THE TALK YET” before either deity could respond Wukong rockets off. 

This can't be good, it can only end in disaster!

* * *

“KID!? WHERE ARE YOU!” The Monkey yelled picking up a random table in the banquet hall. Causing several spirits, that isn’t familiar with Wukong and his bullshit, promptly freak the fuck out. But those that are just continue on with whatever they were doing in hopes Wukong might calm the fuck down. 

“MK!  That father's adrenaline is kicking in! QI XIAOTIAN!?!” 

“D-did Sun Wukong just say ‘father’s adrenaline?” An immortal, who knew full well of Wukong’s track record, said allowed. And loud enough for all the other’s to hear this realization. Okay, now it's time to be officially worried. Just before the immortals in question could escape, a table was sent flying at there head’s. 

“I CAN SEE EVERY EQUATION!” 

* * *

In the Jade Emperor’s throne room, the Jade Emperor himself was finishing up some last minute work before making his appearance. All is good. Life is good. 

“WE HAVE A PROBLEM!”

You just had to jinx it, didn’t you? With a heavy sigh the Jade Emperor looked up, and to the intruder to his sanctum. 

“And what might this problem be that you had to barge in, and yelling your head off no less?” the Jade Emperor demands. 

“M-my applengys” “You better be sorry” “b-Bu-But its Sun W-Wukong sir” 

Just hearing the name of the sun furred monkey caused the Emperor to freeze in fright. 

“What, about Sun Wukong?” he questioned. 

“He- He’s on a RAMPAGE SIR!” “WHAT FOR! IN BUDDHA’S NAME WE THOUGHT WE WAS DEAD AFTER HIS FIGHT WITH THE DEMON BULL KING!” 

The immortal that had barged into the throne room, fidgeted slightly muttring just what shit Sun was on. 

“Speak up” “his son has gone missing” The Emperor did a double take. 

“What?” “HIS SON HAS GONE MISSING!” “I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME” 

Just then a loud ass crash was heard and the roof caved in. scaring the absolute shit out of everyone in the room. 

“DO YOU KNOW WHERE MY SON IS?!” Wukong yelled, pointing that the Jade Emperor, his(Sun’s) aura flaring like wildfire. When the Panicked monkey reserved no answer he crashed through another wall, leaving a Wukong sized whole in the wall as he continued his rampage. 

Oh god, oh fuck, OH FUCKING HELL! At this rate all of heaven may as well come crumbling down! 

“Where is Lao Tzu?!” the Emperor farnaticly asked. 

“right here sir,” Lao Tzu said, having practically materialized behind the Jade Emperor. 

“GAH, don't do that!” “I’ll keep that in mind for future reference” “we need you to get the Diamond snar,” “Already on it” “AND HURRY OR HEAVEN WILL FALL, LITTRALY!” 

* * *

Lao Tzu had heard of the destruction Sun Wukong was causing in wake of his, son going missing. He figured it wouldn't take long till he was ordered to use a Diamond snar on the monkey. Unfortunately he doesn't keep that on hand and has to head back to his place to get it. As he made his way into his workshop he took immediate notice to how messy it was. 

Well that odd, his work space is usually, immaculately clean with the occasional misplaced papers. His mind immediately jumped to the peach pills. But calmed just as fast. He learned his lesson after Wukong drunkenly stumbled in and downed a whole bunch of them. He now kept them in a more safe space only he knew of. Besides this mess was that of a pile of books. Upon closer inspection there was something in the middle of this pile, something human…

Lao Tzu cleared his throat to gain its attention, and the creature gasped and quickly stood up. To the elders surprise a young man, a mortal around the age of twenty, brown hair being kept back but a red bandana. The young man was in a red Tang Suit, with yellowish gold embellishment that looks like a monkey. 

“Uhh, h-hi?” the human said with a shy wave. One of Lao Tzu’s books tucked with care under his arm. 

“May I ask what you are doing in my work space?” “oh, well I sorta got distracted and started wandering and I found this place and I saw the book and-” “And just who are you?” “Qi Xiaotian sir! But I prefer to go by Mk” Lao Tzu stared at the young man before him.

“Oh fantastic, this makes this much simpler” “Makes what more simple?” a confused Mk asked. 

“Makes calming down your father more simpler, so we don’t drop a mountain on him, again.” “wha-” Lao Tzu grabbed Mk by the arm and dragged him along. 

“We have no time to waste Qi Xiaotian, all of heaven depends on your safe return”

oh, this is anticlimactic. Isn't it? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like to imagen Qi Xiaotian is, Mk's real name, and Mk is just a nickname he gets called since he's just a nerd for Monkey King. And Mk just prefers to go by his nickname for angest reasons, i won't get into this fic.   
> And yes, I quoted DAY AT THE PARK, fight me. And if you haven't watched it, go do that this fucking instent you fucking coward! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4xX1pMn8LvA  
> I can not begin to describe the joy it brings me.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I was sitting on this for too long.  
> it's short but after the crack of the last chapter, I just said fuck it.

Lao Tzu pulled Mk along, not bothering to answer the questions of the Monkey Kid. Not like he can anyway, Monkey King is on another fucking rampage, for god's sake most of the bureaucracy thought he was dead- not that you can just simply kill the Sun Wukong, trust him he’s tried- and the staff just like that sword in England, picked its new welder. Sure they didn't know who exactly the staff picked and with the monkey on his current rampage about his ‘son’ Lao Tzu just figured “oh so in the 200 something years he's been gone the idiot had a son and said son can use the overpowered stick- cool” but no. that doesn't seem to be the case. In the apparent madness he was listening to Mk’s rambling, and the words “my father? Wha-” stuck in his head like meat to bones. 

It took just about another ten or so minutes when they finally reached the ‘danger zone’. Sun was currently engaged in a battle with Erlang, and several others trying to apprehend him. And might I add, they were failing, miserably. 

“Wukong!” Lao Tzu called as he and Mk came to a stop. The stone monkey, mid-tossing some unfortunate fool, turned to see the two and immediately drooped said fool and tackle hugged Mk.

“KID!” The monkey fool cried.

(ok that's just corny) 

“Monkey King? What happened?” Mk asked. The confusion is still building in his mind. After a hot minute of hugging from the monkey king, he let go of Mk, his tail thumping behind him, before slipping around Mk’s wrist again. 

“You disappeared IS WHAT HAPPENED! Where were you?! I mean seriously Kid rule one was like ‘no wandering off’!” “o-oh S-sorry Monkey King I just got distracted by this shiny thing and-” Wukong cut him off by hugging him tightly. 

“Whatever kid, I'm just glad you're safe.” The king mumbled softly. Gods be damned he let himself get attached, this kid was going to be the end of him. 

After a few more seconds the Monkey king pulled back, tail still on his ~~son~~ apprentices wrist and scoffed. Turning to face some angry-looking immortals.

“Welp, haha. Looks like WE SHOULD RUN” Wukong said, grabbing Mk by the back of his tang suit and sprinted for the exit. 

“WHAT DID YOU DO?!” “I PANICKED OK? NOW LET'S GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE I GET TRAPPED UNDER A MOUNTAIN AGAIN!” 


End file.
